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My philosophy is DIRENONISM .
95% of my problems today at 50 are due to the fact that at some point I said YES when I should have said NO; saying yes gives you instant comfort, but responsibilities and fears for life or for a long time; saying no, it puts you in discomfort or exposes you to the anger of others for a relatively short time, but gives you strength for the rest of your life, unconditional freedom for the future, examples:
Do not hesitate to say no to your superior for work that you consider incorrect or non-compliant.
Say no to your kids' incessant demands for bogus purchases.
Say no to malicious advances from co-workers.
Say no to co-workers who try to take advantage of your kindness to buy lunch or free transportation
Say no to unknown hitchhikers.
Say no to professional beggars who knock on your doorstep, or on the street.
Say no to visitors without an appointment at home or at work.
Say no to invitations for no apparent reason.
Say no to offers to participate in activities you don't like.
Tell your kids no to excursions with a bunch of friends you don't know.
Acting stupid around certain people when I was a teenager. I think I recovered today but fortunately we are changing.
Not knowing how to take care of myself when it was time for me to do so.
Being disrespectful to my parents as a teenager. We just have two parents and they are irreplaceable.
Being lazy in my last year of high school.
Not having found my academic path for my career immediately after high school.
Letting myself be led on by people who weren't worth it.
Feeling guilty for things I didn't do.
Not having saved more from my first little job.
To have done as much for futile things in my eyes today.
Not having believed in myself and my means enough to get on in life.
Had I been asked this question 5 years back, there would have been a long list of things I regretted doing but now, over the years, I have learned that regret does not do good. If anything, it takes away the opportunity to learn from your experiences, be those bad or good.
So, if I were to list things that I regret, it would be comprised of the things I did not do in my life when I had the chance. For example, being more expressive towards the people who needed to hear it, standing up for myself when I needed it the most and certainly, bungee jumping.
- not defending myself when I should've and perhaps needed it the most.
- Understood more sooner than later that it's not my job to save the world, not at the cost of my own physical and mental wellbeing.
- Not being able to respond to hate with love because I didn't understand that the other person was just hurt.
- Making friends with people who didn't value me and giving up important relationships for them.
- Trusting a friend with the biggest trauma of my life.
- Letting myself be fooled into thinking that something was inherently wrong with me as a child
- Not starting sooner with my career
- Not being able to take initiative in my life due to the fear of constant failure.
- Wasting too much time with work when I could've spent time with my family members.
- hasting things instead of letting them happen at the right time.
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Accepting a job that was closer and not further away, but would have been better.
Being negligent about my future in high school. I was lucky and was pretty good at wrestling to get a scholarship, but I didn't really choose my major as much as it chose me.
Not learning to program sooner. It would have made college so much easier!
I played too many video games when I was young. All that time I could have used to read, learn a new language, talk with my family.
Losing weight excessively for wrestling in college. It made me unhappy and I wasn't interested in this sport anymore and I didn't really like this sport anymore.
Buy a new vehicle. Having a loan for a car sucks!
Not saving more money after college. I saved a little, but I spent it. Save and don't spend it.
Too much focus on dating, instead of my career. Girls come and go, swipe right and dating takes a lot of time.
Not wearing my braces. I have braces a second time. Watch your teeth guys.
Taking high school and other parts of my life too seriously. Enjoy the process and relax.